40 Short Funny Quotes For Notes

If your ability to joke and to be funny is not a natural quality, don’t despair. You can master the craft of humor on your own by turning learning into an exciting adventure. We will tell you how to become a funny, funny and positive person without much time and effort.
How to become funny and be the soul of the company? The answer is simple – make sense of your jokes, fill them with purpose. The audience needs a victim, a specific object of humor. It can be an absent person, an inner enemy, a famous ruler, or some universally recognized vice.
Anything said unexpectedly and right on time remains the brightest and funniest moment. No one expects a joke and there is no preconceived notion of its meaning.

Here’s how to learn to joke spontaneously:

-Recall a joke during a serious conversation
-Give a humorous answer to a tough question
-Tell something both funny and shocking with a neutral facial expression.
50 Short Funny Quotes For Notes will teach you how to become an accomplished joker and prankster.

Cool story, bro

You had a crazy dream? Please tell me all about it

Damn it’s Monday already!

No, I haven’t seen your LSD

I’m watching you

Good morning beautiful

Not funny

I’m not angry. I’m happiness challenged

You wonder why I have so many friends? I wag my tail, not my tongue

I’m smiling, just take the damn picture

I regret nothing

Why will I storm Area 51? I just saw the ad on Facebook!

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else.

I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

A day without laughter is a day wasted.

Political correctness is tyranny with manners.

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

Everyone with telekinetic powers, raise my hand.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

All men are equal before fish.

Life is hard. After all, it kills you.

I am only human, although I regret it.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.

Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.

I had plastic surgery last week – I cut up my credit cards.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them

A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.

An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else

I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early

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